Today I’m writing in French, thanks to LinguaWrite©. This piece of magic automatically translates the original into the reader’s own language, doing away with the need to cut and paste into a translation app. I’m using the demonstrator version, but to use all the features you simply download the LinguaRead© app, pair with Bluetooth and it will read your thoughts so that it knows what language to use. It even handles regional accents, so anyone writing in dialect can still be understood.
LinguaWrite, then called TransLingua, was invented by two bored and possibly drunk software engineers back in 1999, but the prototype was not a huge success as it could only do literal translations. For example, the French expression ‘sans crier gare’ (I’ve had to use override to leave it in the original French), meaning ‘without warning’ in English, came out as ‘without shouting station.’ TransLingua.2 was not much better, as it could only translate nursery rhymes and song lyrics.
But with the technological advances of the last twenty plus years, TransLingua now exists as the LinguaWrite available today. It is far more efficient and user friendly than other translating apps, because of its thought-reading capabilities. Several major languages are now available, but with over 7000 living languages and nearly a thousand dying ones, the LinguaWrite team has a lot on their hands (or as the French would say, bread on the board).
To that end, a pilot study is taking place, with 2000 volunteers speaking 800 languages between them having a LinguaProbe© inserted into their speech centres, which the researchers hope will improve the app’s capacity.
Already governments all over the world are considering its diplomatic applications, doing away with the need for translators, as the consequences of mistranslation can be far-reaching. However, there are rumours that security services are already using LinguaWrite to hack hostile actors’ thoughts, which is causing concern.
In time, legislation may be needed to manage possible misuse. There is talk of the app being restricted to authorised users. A permit may be required, and a security check. But this is all in future. For now, it’s a fun way to access every form of written material in existence (provided you stick to English, French, German, Italian, Spanish and Japanese). It’s a boon for scholars and journalists, as well as everyday readers like you. All you need is a device that supports the app, make sure you switch on the ‘read’ setting so that the app can check your thoughts, and off you go. It also works if you’re bilingual, so no need to think in only one language.
LinguaTech Inc is now reputed to be working on LinguaSpeak, to be paired with a LinguaHear app, which will be much less messy than putting a fish in your ear. The founder, Frank Lyes, is tight-lipped about this development, but tech insiders estimate a launch date of late 2024.
LinguaWrite users still encounter the occasional glitch, as thought filters can get clogged up with biscuit, ooh rainbow, looks cold, where the hell is it, must phone them, almost done, bloody thing won’t work, ah, ah, ah, ah
Hei dere. I dag skriver jeg på norsk, takket være LinguaWrite©
Sorry about that. However, LinguaTech software engineers have assured me the glitch has now been fixed, and great news, LinguaWrite has just added Norwegian!
La tour de Babel??